I thought about writing a "fruit fly's guide to getting laid in a gay club".. but much like the shock and horror I experienced recently when a guy told me that he knew that sometimes girls say 'no' for reasons as simple as they haven't shaved their legs/tingtang "fill in the blank here to describe any other normally hairy body part. I thought no, no.. .. "girl power".. . I'm not gonna let THAT cat out of the bag!
After all, I have to protect all my girls out there and not dampen their chances of getting laid. then again, there's also the fact that it probably wouldn't reach it's intended audience here anyway!
And I want to know who the HELL told him that anyway - she needs to turn in her ovaries!!!! Men are not allowed to know that.. ok, STRAIGHT men are not allowed to know that.. as far as they are concerned, we are always smoothe, clean and ready.. just disinterested!
Ahhh.. here's the thing.. you gay men.. you do love our boobies don't you!
And I'll have you know, that as much as you do protest, every gay club needs fruitflies - and we like sex too.. so stop being so damn pissy and making "ew" noises if you see us making out with someone of the opposite sex! You don't own every gay man in the club, and even if someone is normally gay.. it doesn't mean they can't try something new/different once in awhile!!
See.. the thing is, I never went to a gay club with the intention of 'getting laid'.. yes, I presumed that at various points throughout the night, my nipples/breasts would probably get felt up and or pinched, hence the snazzy bra I usually wore.. but it never really was a factor in the decision making process as to whether or not I would go out dancing with my gay boyfriends. (but just incase I usually always shaved my legs!)
See - the thing is, if there was one bi/confused... or pansexual guy in the club, 'He' always found me.. AND - 'HE' always asked if I was gay, straight.. bi.. (I'm just horny..really)
I NEVER hit on a guy in a gay club.. never never never.. if there's one way to gross out a gay man, and potentially get yourself barred from a gay club, it's for a girl to feel up a gay guy's crotch and/or ass and tell him you haven't had a good hard dick in awhile. ( I "am" a little more sublte than that, I'm just using that as an example... ahem) See below what happens to me when I am not so subtle...I end of sniffing ass...
(it could also be intimidating, unless they're doing the combo.. you know... lol unless they're one of those lucky ones that didn't suffer from shrinky dink whilst riding the train.)
Even last year when I was in San Francisco - holy crap on a cracker.. I went to the Power House with a gay boyfriend.. (and he told me.. "ain't gonna happen here sweetheart.." ) and it was almost like a mission just to demonstrate the power of the boobs...
In the end he was only half wrong.. that is, a straightish guy asked to suck my nipple (actually I believe he said "want me to suck your tit?".. romantic eh?!
Though I told him I didn't need his nipple sucking charity, he insisted.. so being the generous girl that I am.. bing bam boom.. nipple's in his mouth with drag queens looking on..
But then he was pretty much bullied by the bystanders into taking out his penis.. and was like.. "I'm shy".. SHY??!! and then he left.. and there I was.. engine's running but I'm in the garage alone....
Arrrrggghhh... anyway - the moral of the story is, if you're in the backroom of a club and you nag a girl into letting you suck her nipple.. do NOT, I repeat.. do NOT leave the room without sticking something in her. (especially if she hasn't had sex in awhile) it's not only mean, it's dangerous too... I had to outweigh that guy by at least 40 pounds!
Just so you all know, there's a whole world of difference between 'playing' with a girl's nipple..and 'sucking' it. The former means.. "hey.. this is something I never do..fun! .. see ya later" and harmless.. and the latter means.. "I'd like to cap this off with a spunk load of cum all over your face" 'nuf said!